I come from no native language
Perfect english escaping my father’s lips
Cocoa eyes watering at the taste of curry
Paper cuts from pages of bold lettering
Words that express what it means to be Indian have no meaning
But how can that be?
Am I not Indian too?
My whiteness bubbles inside me
Indian shown only in the pigment of my skin
The color of hardwood floors
Creaking as I step
Spilling the empty shell underneath
Just because I am American,
Am I not Indian too?
A trip to India to patch myself up
Holding Jiaji’s hand
Wading through polluted cities
Looking for a part of myself that I cannot find
Shying away from lives so different than mine
Just because I am not Indian,
Am I not Indian too?
When I am lost I remember Jiaji’s words
The Mul Mantar repeated since my wide eyes first met hers
My strongest connection to being Punjabi
Language that I know means something important
But I cannot fully grasp
Just because I do not understand,
Am I not Indian too?
My mother’s stillwater eyes
My father like an oak tree
Two people, two identities
Mix to form me
My threads intersecting many paths
Just because I am not one,
Am I not Indian too?